St. Dympna's Well

It is not my habit to write about events that I've not witnessed, but sometimes stories get passed around cricket dressing rooms that are just too good to go unreported.

Last week, our opening bowler Stewart Gill (a good church going boy) went on a pilgrimage to the Republic of Ireland where he did a tour of sacred catholic shrines. One of these visits was to St. Dympna's Well. For those of you who like your historical context, St. Dympna is the patron saint of mental illness and those of us who know Stewart well will spot the irony.

Apparently, tradition dictates that pilgrims approach the well and dip a part of themselves into the water, usually a hand or an elbow. Stewart, being the unconventional type decided that he would dip his St. Christopher pendant. Personally, I would have removed the pendant from my neck first.

As Stewart bent over, he steadied himself on the wrought metalwork that surrounded the well. This metalwork was of soothing and reverential design topped with the unsurprising title 'ST. DYMPNA'S WELL'.

Unfortunately, the metalwork, though aesthetically pleasing, was not designed to support the weight of our big Stew and it gave way. This meant that Stewart plunged headlong into the sacred waters and got trapped with his head submerged and his legs kicking furiously for attention.

Fortunately, Stewart's 11 year old son James was at hand and pulled his father free which was some feat for a little lad who presumably was holding his sides at the same time.

Stewart emerged dazed and spluttering and frantically shaking his head free of the holy H2O.

Obviously a quick exit was the order of the day but as he scarpered, Stewart risked a backward glance at the scene of his embarrassment. The ornate metalwork was now a tangled mess and he had somehow managed to destroy parts of the lettering that named this holy place.

The sacred revered shrine that has given comfort to pilgrims from all over the world for hundreds of years now bears the legend 'ST DYM'S WILI'.